We head into Week 13 of the 2023 NFL season after a heartbreaking Sunday for our parlays. Our Week 12 card went 0-3 due to some absolute nonsense.
Shoutouts are in order to the Philadelphia Eagles, New York Giants, Carolina Panthers, Tennessee Titans, and Denver Broncos. They did their part to green our parlays.
However, we couldn’t get four more points in the game between the New Orleans Saints and Atlanta Falcons, the Houston Texans lost a heartbreaker, the Las Vegas Raiders led 14-0 and still couldn’t cover, and the Cleveland Browns couldn’t muster 14 points.
Regardless, I need to be better. With that goal in mind, let’s get into my top NFL Week 13 parlay picks.
NFL Week 13 Parlay Picks
All NFL betting odds used for these Week 13 parlays are current as of Wednesday, Nov. 29, and courtesy of DraftKings Sportsbook.
Best Parlay: MIA ML + DET ML + LAC ML (+151)
Longshot Parlay: NYJ ML + IND -1 + DEN-HOU Over 47.5 + LAR -3.5 (+1514)
Same Game Parlay: PIT ML + ARI Over 9.5 + Total Under 41 (+300)
NFL Week 13 Best Parlay Bet
Week 13 Best Parlay (+151)
- Dolphins ML (-455) vs Commanders
- Lions ML (-205) vs Saints
- Chargers ML (-265) vs Patriots
What do you get when the best offense in the NFL goes up against the worst defense in the NFL?
An easy win for the offense. And in this case, an easy victory for the Miami Dolphins.
Last week, the Dolphins won by 21 points, and the Washington Commanders lost by 35 points. Expect a similar blowout on Sunday.
- Check out our favorite NFL Week 13 prop bets.
I’ll pair Miami with the Detroit Lions, who lost a tough one on Thanksgiving to the Green Bay Packers after an awful start. I’m still not sure how the Saints lost to the Falcons, but they sure found a way.
Detroit will bounce back, while New Orleans continues on its current downward trajectory.
Lastly, the Los Angeles Chargers have been shockingly bad this season. They have the tools to succeed, but they just continue to find ways to lose.
Similarly, the New England Patriots continue to find new ways to lose. And losing to the Chargers will only add to a season-long list of disappointment.
NFL Week 13 Longshot Parlay Bet
Week 13 Longshot Parlay (+1514)
- Jets ML (+130) vs Falcons
- Colts -1 (-110) vs Titans
- Broncos vs Texans Over 47.5 (-110)
- Rams -3.5 (-108) vs Browns
Is it ridiculous to pick the New York Jets, a team that has lost four straight games and has only scored two touchdowns in those four games (one being a defensive touchdown), to win a game?
Yes, yes it is. Will I still do it because they’re playing the Falcons at home and this is a longshot parlay? Also yes.
Don’t look now, but the Indianapolis Colts are in the mix for the AFC South title, while there’s no chance the Titans win the division. This is a big game for the Colts, look for them to continue their hot streak after winning three straight.
- Get our top moneyline, ATS, and Over/Under plays in our NFL Week 13 picks.
For our third leg, we’re looking for a high-scoring game between the Broncos and Texans. Denver has averaged 23.4 points per game over its last five games, all of which were wins.
Houston has averaged 25.8 points per game over its last five and has scored at least 30 points in four games this season. This pivotal AFC clash is going to be a shootout.
To close out the longshot parlay, we need the Los Angeles Rams to cover against the Browns. Since losing Deshaun Watson, Cleveland has been abysmal to watch.
The Browns have scored fewer than 14 points in two straight games and gave up 29 to the Broncos last week. The Rams are fully healthy and have an explosive offense, so look for them to dominate.
NFL Week 13 Same Game Parlay Bet
Cardinals vs Steelers Same Game Parlay (+300)
- Steelers ML (-245)
- Cardinals: Over 9.5 (-575)
- Total Points Under 41 (-108)
Unless you’re a Pittsburgh Steelers or Arizona Cardinals fan, you’re not watching this game. So, let’s make it interesting with a same-game parlay.
The Steelers fired offensive coordinator Matt Canada, and Kenny Pickett immediately threw for a season-high 278 yards, Najee Harris ran for a season-high 99 yards, and Pat Freiermuth had a season-high 120 receiving yards.
Are you seeing a pattern yet?
However, that increased efficiency won’t necessarily correlate to points. The Steelers mustered 16 points last week and have scored less than 20 more often than not this season.
- Stay up to date on the latest line moves with our NFL Week 13 odds.
The Cardinals have been horrible this season, even with Kyler Murray at the helm. Arizona averages 17.2 points per game, good for 25th in the league.
This game is going to be a low-scoring battle, so we’re looking at what will probably be a 20-13 game.
The Steelers win. The Cardinals score more than nine points. The Under hits. And we all go home happy.